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Diary
I have so many problems that its like impossible to put into words. My
mother whom I call (Kris) is crazy. She has boarder-line personality,
depression, and a shit load of otha stuff. She's been in jail. So has
my father, for excessive use of pills. In school people make fun of me
like "Slut", "Ugly" "fat" "loser"..
And so on.. I started stealing my dads tranquilizers and I cut. He found
out bout it now he treats me like I'm some fucking mass murderer!! Whatever..
I couldn't take it any more so I ran away
I
am 13 years old and on November 24, 2003, my friend and I ran away...
Here are some diary entries I wrote
5:30
PM
we are packing our bags then were outta this fuckin hellhole. I HATE SMALL
TOWNS! My friend took the food, and I took the blankets and water bottles.
We bundled up in our sweatshirts, two pairs of pants, layers of socks,
and our jackets. I kissed my friend good-bye as he desperately tried to
talk us out of it. But our minds were already made...were running away.
6:00
PM
It's not too cold outside. I 'm sweating with all these clothes on. We
walked (more like ran) down "M" street, we just wanted to get
out of our small town so that it would be harder for the police to find
us.
6:33
PM
We just past O'connors yesss!!! Were finally in the city! We just got
on a back road ... so we wouldn't be out in the open for like rapists
to find us. It's getting soooo cold OMYGOD I cant feel my friggin feet.
We took a break at a street curb.
7:00
PM
Hey didn't we already pass that house? Shit.. We musta gone in a fuckin
circle!! Let's take the next back road. We did.
7:30
PM
Turned out that goddamn street connected to the otha neighborhood we just
got out of! So now were back on the main street...
7:45
PM
Were at some Chinese restaurant to use the rest rooms. *Evil stares* Why
can't people just mind there own fucking buisness?! Shouldn't we start
looking for a place to sleep? Hey.. How bout' the woods by the movies?
8:00
PM
ohmygod!! It feels so nice being all warm ... after searching for what
seemed like hours we finally found a place to sleep. Noone could see us
because there was a fence and a cement thing above our heads.
8:30
PM
WOW.. I wasnt prepared for this!! ITS SOOOOOOO COLD!!! I can make it..We
can make it just dont think about the fact that I cant feel my toes...
9:00
PM I fell asleep for a half and hour these dumb ass kids keep on screaming!
GO HOME!!
9:30
PM
God I shouldn't have brought her.. (my "friend") she wont stop
fucking complaining.. HELLO I'mfeelin it to!! I kept on telling her GO
HOME if u want to but I need to wait until afternoon to go back IF I went
back.
10:00
PM
Can't sleep... we have to sheets under us but I can still feel the freezing
cold ground. It's 28 degrees out!! All we have covering us is an even
more freezing cold sleeping bag.. and SHE keeps on hogging all the covers!
11:00
PM I can't believe that Thanksgiving is in 2 days... my familys gonna flip!
Actually, they might not.. They probably havent even noticed..
12:00
AM
Anotha hour of sleep... SHIT I gotta pee!! I got my friendup and we went
to see if the movies were still open cause all the lights were on inside.
There was this black car like 2 inches away from the entrance, and all
the doors were open. It took me a while, but we finally figured out that
it was a burglary.
12:15
AM
Cops came.. We like literally held our breaths so they couldn't hear us.
Luckily they didn't and soon left. I looked over at my friend and she
almost fainted. WHAT? WHAT IS IT?! Your face!! look in this mirror...
My face was purple!! I was so cold... I look down at my knees and they
were shaking uncontrollably. But still, I was not yet gonna give up.
1:00
AM
My friends persuasive shit ain't gonna work on me! I wish she would just
shut up..I'm not leaving. I looked up at the sky, the stars were still
out. I'm gonna try to get some sleep I'm soo tired.
2:55
AM I cant put up with her any more!! I HATE HER... CAN WE JUST GO HOME?!
NO WE FUCKIN CANT!!!!!!! Do you know how many CRAZY ass people are out
this time of night?? Shes soo gay. Once we're back I'm NEVER speaking
to her again.
3:00
AM
Ya know what?! SCREW THIS... we're going home. My right leg was totally
numb! I could barely walk. we were heading twards a Honey Frams she wanted
to stop in there to use the rest room... as we were walking in there we
saw a police car. WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE! OUR PARENTS PROBABLY CALLED
THEM... COME ON LETS HED BACK TO THE MOVIES WERE ONLY LIKE
5 MINUTES AWAY. Uggggghhhhh.... WHY DO I LISTEN TO HER???????!!!!!!! NoOo...
she had to go in there... so we go in and the worker there gave us the
dirtiest look known to humanity. (I don't blame him though, we WERE wearing
backpacks at 3 in the morning.) On our way out of there we bumped right
into a police officer. He didn't say anything though.. We saw him talking
to the worker.. so we continued walking. There was another police car!!
He asked us were we were going and why we were out at 3 in the morning.
My friend being the stupid bitch she is.. was like "were just hanging
out" She was so excited to be talking to the police. I wasn't though,
cause I have bad experiances with them and I hate law enforcement. But
anyways, he asked us our names and our phone numbers we told them and
he kept on asking "if we we're sure about that" I was like YEAH
OBVIOUSLY I KNOW MY OWN FUCKIN NAME. One by one police cars started filling
up the parking lot of Block Busters. I say we should of ran but she didn't
go for it so of couse being the follower I am I didn't go. They called
our parents and we got picked up. I 'm in therapy now and I'm on Zoloft
for depression. I'm planning on doing it again only WITHOUT my "friend".
My
dad told me that he called my other so-called friend and she totally ratted
on us she's all "ya, they were talking about this all day in school
there going to o'connors thats all I know sorry" I HATE HER I HAVEN'T
TALKED TO HER FOR LIKE A WEEK... AND I NEVER WILL!
Advice;
if anyone reading this is having problems and you just can't handle it
anymore run away. It's great to be on your own... Just watch out for the
crazies. Um... BRING EXTRA CLOTHES AND BLANKETS. ITS FREEZING. Or else
go in the summer.
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